Thursday, March 25, 2010

Happy Like Daisies

A friend once described me as being "happy like daisies " and it's been my favorite compliment I have ever received. I love those adorable little yellow and white delicate flowers that reach up high, turning their faces up to the warm sunshine. I wish that i could be happy like daisies all the time. I admire those people who are genuinely joyful at all times, no matter what the circumstances. I'm trying to get there. To smile and genuinely mean it. To love on people, letting happiness radiate from my very being. I want to embrace life and all it offers. Always knowing that the bad doesn't last forever, and that good always triumphs over evil. That laughter helps to ease pain, and smiles always encourage others. Something has been changing this week. The happiness I long for, the true undeniable joyfulness is welling up inside my heart waiting to break out. It's time to allow it to.
I desire to truly be Happy Like Daisies!

Thursday, March 18, 2010

my heart hurts

tonight my heart hurts.
my teary eyes are filled to overflowing.
my heart is beating so fast, it causes my head to pound.
it shouldn't matter anymore.
it shouldn't hurt anymore.
i shouldn't care anymore.
actually, i don't know if 'care' is the right word.
because when i honestly examine my feelings, i guess i truly feel left out.
wondering what i could have done to lessen the heartache.
it's exhausting.
i'm tired of letting this bother me.
...of letting those memories flood into my mind like a rushing, icy river.
leaving me breathless, cold and saddened.
i want with everything i am, for tonight to be the last time my heart aches with this much hurt.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

have i missed it?

i wish i could stop looking at the past.
what could have been.
what might have been.
what isn't, nor ever will be.
have i missed something that He wanted me to do?
i'm plagued with looking backward, when i should be looking forward.
i feel that i have had opportunities that are now lost.
that i won't get another chance.
that i have already been given my allotted amount of opportunities.
that i am stuck here and i'm not moving forward.
and it hurts my heart.
because i know it's not true.
i know that i haven't ran out of opportunities.
i know there is more to come.
something better.
something more lovely.
more beautiful.
more perfect for me.
designed by a God who loves me, more then i could ever comprehend.
and i'll just continue to wait.
until He decides to reveal the rest of His plan for me.
i'm tired of waiting.
but He knows.
and He won't keep me waiting. for long.